Dear HBG [half-bikini guy]

I understand it is de rigueur for you, this half-bikini thing. Guess what? I found a real one for you! 
It’s from a Spanish brand called Alter – the “string lateral flash” product. A bit pricey at 22 euros, it’s described as “ultra sexy that encloses one side of the waist, comfort and lateral support are provided by the fabric’s high elastane content.” Meaning it won’t fall off easily. So  you see Mr. HBG, you don’t have to belabor that poor bikini of yours, anymore. Call or email me, I ordered all colors just for you.