The things I discover in the mail! Looking at this photo made me summon into mind The Clientele’s spoken-word Losing Haringey, tweaking it a bit: When I look back at this there’s nothing to grasp, no starting point. I was inside an underexposed photo from 1994. Strongest of all was the feeling of 1994-ness: dizzy, illogical, as if none of the intervening disasters and wrong turns had happened yet. I felt guilty and inconsolably sad. I felt the instinctive tug back – to school, the memory of shopping malls, cooking, driving in my mother’s car. All gone, gone forever.