Dear Aljur, Consider this as tutorial in the art of macho dancing in Manila. While we generally appreciate your efforts to portray a male prostitute bump and grinding his way on prime time tv, we feel that your dancing and clothes and ways are not enough. Something’s not quite right, to tell you bluntly. So here’s a pictorial guide on how it is supposed to be carried out.
You can cover your self with blue body paint. And sway with your arms, legs sideways.
Or maybe gold body paint!
If you’re too shy, you can cover your mug with a nice mask. Take note of the smooth moves. Pop and lock.
As for the costume, you can put on some fancy headdress. Maybe a cape, too. Just remember to be sexy at all times.
Or perhaps dress up in tribal gear, e.g. feathers and synthetic animal prints.
An Egyptian pharaoh would do. Just don’t be too generous with the eye makeup.
How about French-artist-dancing? One word: beret. Of course, you’ll have to take everything off at the end of the song.
An intricate body art will be amusing. Careful with the red paint, though.
If you’re gunning for shock factor, never ever use a chicken on stage. Blood and gore. Nasty.
Candles will do just fine. Just not on the head. Down there.
So, you see Aljur, it’s that simple. It’s the shimmy with the step, sway and swing. Do it erotically. And till-blue-in-the-face remember, always stick your penis out because if all else fails, you have to dazzle them with dick!